Stacey Grondahl peppers her language with profanity and salacious comments inside of her cozy Scottsdale spa, We Do Men.
She’s known as the “Boss Lady,” and rightly so. Grondahl manhandles her clients through massage and aesthetic treatments with names only appropriate for adult ears.
“Men can be really full of themselves, but when they come in here, I break them down and I build them back up,” she says. “I try to get them to get their head out of their (butt) and be aware of everything about themselves in the most positive, tough love way.”
Speaking in front of the iconic photo of Johnny Cash flipping the bird, Grondahl says men love her treatment of them.
“Men are so much easier. They’re more fun and they’re more loyal,” explains Grondahl, who was born in North Dakota but raised in Bakersfield, California. “Funny story. I was supposed to be a boy. My mom wanted a boy.”
It didn’t turn out that way.
“Luckily, she still loves me,” says Grondahl, who adds she was supposed to be named Christopher. “I grew up with boys, so I’ve always resonated with men. I was always the tough kid, the soccer player, and all of that.”
We Do Men’s roots were planted in the summer of 2012, while Grondahl was working with Rhonda Allison Skincare’s men’s and women’s lines.
“I was resonating toward their men’s line and really, really, really loved it,” she said. “I wasn’t giving a crap about the other side, to be completely honest, because it was just OK. I was obsessed with it and I needed to go with it.
“Every guy I talked to would listen to every single thing I told them to do. If I told him to guy to buy something, he would buy it. They were trying to recruit me to come work for them in industries that had nothing to do with mine.”
Still, despite the clues she had, it took her “a million years” to find her niche. She opened We Do Men at age 26 in what she calls a perfect location.
“I walked in here and the whole place felt so amazing,” Grondahl says. “I had no idea how to do it, but I needed this whole place. I told (the landlord) I don’t just want a room. I want the whole thing. To this day, I don’t know how I pulled it off. I really don’t—but I did.”
The athletic Grondahl’s aggressive behavior and language works in her favor. She speaks, and men want to listen. The names of her treatments are just as raunchy. Let’s just say they involve cactus, tea and tequila. For a menu of services, visit wedomen.com.
“The names of my treatments have stories behind them, or are hilarious innuendos that actually mean not what they mean,” she says.
Trained in massage by a Hungarian masseuse, Grondahl takes that knowledge and merges it with her own style.
“I do massage-based facials,” she cites as an example. “I don’t use tools or technology. I use my hands for everything.
“I utilize bad-ass ingredients with manual manipulation because scientifically and ethically and just being human, we need to be touched to survive. There are a lot of lonely people out there. Just having your face touched has amazing effects and it’s really, really important for somebody’s psyche. It’s a little bit of psychology. We don’t treat you like a dollar sign. We put our hands on your body and handle the (crap) out of you.”
Client Richard Jackson, who works as a collegiate referee, found Grondahl on Yelp three years ago to help with razor bumps and other skin conditions.
“She’s actually this fun-loving person who explains everything to you,” Jackson says. “You don’t want anyone touching your face without knowing what’s going on. I always tell people I’m a referee and I need to put my best face forward. So, I always need Stacey around.”
Grondahl has seen her share of the ups and downs of the industry. She lost her ability to massage full time because she was “worked to death” at a California spa. Her colleagues suffered torn tendons in their wrists and rotator cuff injuries. Grondahl has a degenerative muscle condition.
“I’d be in a room sometimes with somebody for three hours without a break,” she says. “I would do a 90-minute facial, followed by a 90-minute massage right afterward. Three hours of nonstop physical touch and they’re making bank. We were slaving away.
“It’s like an old, tattered rope that can break from an inflammation-induced injury,” she says. “It feels like needles.”
It took her two years to recover, spending that time on disability. At the age of 24, she thought she was losing use of her hand.
“I’m permanently disabled, so I cannot do massage anymore,” she says. “I have good days and bad days, like when the weather changes. In the summertime I get a little inflamed. In the winter, I get a little aggravated.”
She’s still able to give clients what they want. One man was referred to her by his mother and sister.
“They were really worried about his mental health,” she recalls. “After he came to see me, they said he was brighter, happier and more chipper. He was taking better care of himself.”
Grondahl encourages her clients to text her about anything that bothering them—whether it’s what to wear on a date or solving those pesky skin issues. She wants to be the Rachel Zoe of the men’s grooming industry.
“I just want to go everywhere and help as many guys as possible,” she says. “That’s what I want to do. It’s about enhancing guys, encouraging them to be their best self at any age and not settle. Taking care of yourself is not a luxury. It’s a necessity and we do it all while rocking out to old school tunes.”
We Do Men: A Male Concept Spa, 4375 N. 75th Street, Scottsdale, 480.686.8538 (talk or text), wedomen.com.